Let it Go – Demi Lovato

After my trip to Peru last August, I’ve done a lot of soul searching.  I’ve really been digging deep to think about what in my life is most important?  What do I enjoy doing?  What am I involved in that isn’t fulfilling for me?  There are several people who know the details of a challenge I’ve been going through at work these last several months.  Although there’s still a lot of change happening that can be unsettling, I truly desire to get to a place where I can just “let it go.”  For a really long time, I felt like each day I was living out these lyrics:  “Don’t let them in, don’t let them see, be the good girl you always had to be.  Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know.”  But…”Well now they know.”

Now, I feel like these lyrics describe how I truly feel:  “And the fears that once controlled me can’t get to me at all.  Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe.  I know I left a life behind but I’m too relieved to grieve.  Let it go, let it go, can’t hold it back anymore.  Let it go, let it go, turn my back and slam the door.”  I will no longer let someone control my self-esteem, or make me believe I’m not good at what I do.  I now see the importance of standing up for myself.  Even in this last week, I sat in a meeting where my heart had been hurt again with the same words I had heard before.  I’m not doing that any more.  In that meeting I didn’t have enough courage to stand up and walk out, even though my head was thinking I should.  I don’t want to do that any more.  It’s not worth it.  I don’t care what this one person thinks about me.  I don’t care about being friends, because my identity isn’t in this friendship at work, it’s in Christ.  And that relationship is way more important to me than this one.  My goal is not to be rude.  I don’t want to be unkind.  I also don’t want to be manipulated and bullied any more.  I’m done.  My goal is to have a cordial relationship, and nothing more.  Each morning I just need to listen to this song again, and do my best to just let it go.

Let it Go – Demi Lovato
Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door.

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
Not a footprint to be seen.
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I’m the queen.
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside.
Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I tried.

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see,
Be the good girl you always had to be
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know.
Well now they know.

Chorus:
Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand and here I’ll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway.

It’s funny how some distance makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me can’t get to me at all.
Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe.
I know I left a life behind but I’m too relieved to grieve.  Chorus

Standing frozen
In the life I’ve chosen.
You won’t find me.
The past is all behind me
Buried in the snow.

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore.

Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand, and here I’ll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway, yeah.
(Na na, na na, na na na na) [4x]
Let it go
Na, na.
Here I stand.
Let it go, let it go
Let it go.

I Was Here – Beyoncé

As I reflect back on 2013, it’s incredible to think about everything I’ve done and been a part of this last year.  For those of you who have been a part of this last year with me, thank you.  I’ve learned what it means to have a life full of adventure, passion, love, and joy.  That’s also what this song is about for me.  Every word speaks to my heart – and what I hope my life is about.  “I want to say I lived each day, until I died, and know that I meant something in, somebody’s life.  The hearts I have touched, will be the proof that I leave, that I made a difference, and this world will see.  I was here.  I lived, I loved.  I was here.  I did, I’ve done, everything that I wanted and it was more than I thought it would be.  I will leave my mark so everyone will know.  I was here.”  Whether it’s the patients at my job, or the people I meet on the opposite side of the world, I want everyone to see Christ in my life.  I want to make a difference.  For the first time in several years, I’m not making a list of “resolutions” to start off 2014.  Instead, I’m going to remember this song, and keep these lyrics in my pocket each and every day.  I want to begin every morning by thinking:  How can my life be an example of Christ and the Gospel today?

I Was Here – Beyoncé
I wanna leave my footprints on the sands of time
Know there was something that, meant something that I left behind
When I leave this world, I’ll leave no regrets
Leave something to remember, so they won’t forget

Chorus:
I was here
I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I’ve done everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here.

I want to say I lived each day, until I died
And know that I meant something in, somebody’s life
The hearts I have touched, will be the proof that I leave
That I made a difference, and this world will see.  Chorus x2

I just want them to know
That I gave my all, did my best
Brought someone some happiness
Left this world a little better just because

I was here.  Chorus

I was here.